30 Mar 2011
Everything is two of the same at home that an innocent bystander will start rubbing her eyes, just to make sure that she is not assaulted with a sudden case of double vision syndrome.
But, totally worth it!!!!
28 Mar 2011
Montessori is a philosophy. I consider it as a ‘way of life’ as opposed to ‘alternate schooling method’.
Magic number in Montessori – 3.
Mixed age classrooms. Younger children and older children working together is a typical trait of a Montessori classroom.
Montessori classroom, often called as an environment, is divided in to practical life area, sensorial area, language area, cultural area and math area. In practical life children learn things like pouring from one cup to another, the hand control and hand-eye coordination learnt from this process is later applied to writing. Every area is interlinked. Though a typical Montessori classroom is a big hall with 50 – 55 children of mixed age, the children magically segregate themselves in to age appropriate areas. Younger children are almost always found in the practical life area, the older children in the math area and such.
Motto behind the Montessori environment is ‘everything has a place and everything in its place’. Same applies for children and teachers in the environment. The teacher’s place - to observe and to guide. The children find their own place in the environment. Coming in to a Montessori environment the children are taught by modeling – by both the adults and the other children in the environment. The new child finds where she fits in this well organized environment and slowly grows from a novice to a leader.
Montessori considers 0-6 years of age as a unique window. It is known as ‘sensitive period’. Through her environment, the child is forming experiences which play a major role in how the neural networks are formed in the brain. By four these neural networks are precipitating and it becomes increasing difficult to rewrite the neural patterns. That is why many Montessori schools have an age limit after which they do not take non-Montessori children in to their environment.
Montessori places great deal of respect on sense of order, which is innate in a child. The first three years, all the child does is to make sense of the world and create order within herself. Sense of order in simple words can be explained as ‘where everything goes and when everything happens’. Though she cannot tell time, the child has a concept of time. Example, nap after lunch, dinner after going to the park, read books before bed etc. When the environment is predictable – few things, each in its place, well displayed, the child is more confident in the environment. Care must be taken to respect the child’s sense of order.
Many steps exist in a work and this is called cycle of work. If the child wants to paint, the cycle is -> get the apron on -> get paper -> pick paint -> paint -> place art work on drying shelf -> get water in a pail/container to clean easel -> dry the easel with a towel -> dump dirty water -> dry the container -> place all material in respective places (used towel in laundry basket, hang apron on peg, used paint cup and brushes in the sink). Every adult unfamiliar with Montessori to whom I have explained this cycle, have expressed doubts like , ‘this is too restrictive/child will feel burdened/are you for real?/this will never work’ etc. But I have seen 18 month – two year old children who do this without missing a beat. The main thing to recognize is that the doubt lies not within the child, but within the adult. The adult’s contribution to make sure that the child progresses successively without breaking the cycle of work is, to do the work once herself, think through the steps bearing in mind the age of the child, make sure that everything is available in the right place in the environment – like the paper is trimmed to size and placed on the paper tray, paints are filled regularly, dirty paint cups/brushes are cleaned and replaced, art work drying rack is accessible, towels are filled in the hamper, sink/faucet is easily accessible. I have also heard arguments that it is too much to expect from a child. I disagree. We talk about gratification and this is how a child learns gratification. Children learn their boundaries, which is not at all negative. Not to mention they expand their mind to the thinking that a certain problem has many steps and vice versa are aware that the small steps lead to a bigger picture.
Montessori environment places high emphasis on grace and courtesy. The idea is to teach through example that every person, every object, every process needs to be respected. This simple thing has deeper spiritual meaning. I can almost draw a curriculum web based on this.
Montessori, considers everything as work and every work is done in a certain way. In a manner of speaking even play is work and children are expected to play without harming themselves or their friends.
Montessori is based on reasoning and believes that fantasy can wait till the child is six and is capable of recognizing fantasy. As I have told many times, this does not make the children deficit of imagination and creative thinking. If a child is inclined to enjoying fantasy, even if they are Montessori schooled, they grow in to adults with logically sound fantasies. My most famous argument, ‘logic can exist without fantasy, but fantasy cannot exist without logic’. As an extension of this, tech toys, the iPads, iPhone apps and such are frowned upon. Because a young child needs to recognize not just cause and effect, but also a reason for this. All tech toys do is to teach children that things happen, take it for granted and don’t ever try to open your toy and analyze why and how.
Movement is incorporated in to the process of learning. Movement molds brain development in wondrous ways.
Montessori environment is filled with non-plastic objects, earth tones, no bright over stimulating colors, wooden materials, natural fabrics and such.
Montessori is neither strict nor all play. I like to think of it as flexibility within a structure.
Many more things to say, but I leave you all with this: any philosophy is only as sound as the adult who implements it.
17 Mar 2011
Since this is a mommy blog, I have to write about the kids, even if it is once in four months.
Chula, all of a sudden looks so grown up. She is all of her 6.5 years and a little more, if you ask me. The danger in this is, I start thinking of her as an adult and start developing adult level expectations and she has to grow up, even more than she is currently, in order to catch up! Constantly reevaluating every scenario and breaking this cycle has been my prominent job for the past one year.
She has certainly departed from the ‘child’ category, but yet to arrive as a ‘girl’. In this journey, she is opening her mind and assimilating the world, thanks to the zillion-gazillion books she is devouring, eyes that are constantly observing and ears that are always listening.
Parents have been aware of the phenomenon of adolescence for ages now. Even terrible twos get noticed by parents, thanks to the child. But the flux children get caught while moving from what Dr.Montessori would call the ‘absorbent mind’ to ‘concrete thinking’ does not get the attention it deserves. From the parents point of view, first comes the monumental process of child birth. You don’t even get time to count all the toes and fingers and feel confident about the health of the offspring, you have to jump head first in to understanding a newborn’s needs and establishing a pattern that works. You take a breather and terrible twos is staring you in your face, which quite frankly is a misnomer, because we all know that terrible twos starts before two and drags on till four! Through out this phase we input values, family and personal, observe the outcome and keep tweaking the limits till we have a self propagating control system. By the time the child is six we start thinking about curriculum, extra-curricular activities, schedules, the poor second born, if any and such. So the transition from child to girl/boy gets least notice, even if the parent notices it, since this transition is mostly inward, they pretend that it does not exist and do not want to deal with it.
I get some clues to what Chula is thinking. Of her most recent fascinations – namely poverty, pain, meanness, good and bad, kindness etc, the top priority goes to jail. Do children even go to jail? Why? Why would some one want to punish children? Are there even children capable of committing punishable offenses? Baby girl, I will tell you the truth and promise to answer your questions, but when you ask me, ‘But….amma…..if I don’t put my seat belt on, YOU are the one going to jail. Right???’, it scares me a little.
By now it is clear to me that she has a very broad sense of time. I think this is it. It is not going to change and I can either deal with it or try and make her perfect. While I understand that she gets it from me, it is annoying to have two such people living under the same roof. Half the battles between me and Chula is because of the clock. She is constantly taking her own sweet time to do things and I am constantly micromanaging her. It is chaos and friends will vouch to that!
Her clarity of thoughts amazes me at times. The other day she told me, ‘Not because I like you amma, because I love you amma.’ One of the drives back home, she requested for Enthiran songs and I replied, ‘The iPod is in shuffle mode and one of these songs will be an Enthiran song. I cannot drive and DJ.’ The reply she gave me for that, ‘Amma, there are 7 songs in Enthiran. There are 273 songs in your iPod. So 7 out of 273 will be from Enthiran’. I did not make a squeak after that.
After Chula was born, I learnt the art of giving choices. If I put my mind to it, I can give a child choices and still get the exact results I want. But now Chula is in a stage where she wants a role in coming up with the choices. She wants to be more involved in me parenting her. My choices are to either try figuring out how a child can parent herself or learn this new art without any manual what so ever. Sigh.
Her sense of humor is developing really well
Mieja…..
Her current thing is to yell, ‘Don’t talk about me’, on the occasions I narrate something adorable she did/said. So here I am, writing about her.
She is still asking cyclic questions. Now her cyclic questions are scientific. Need I say that I have completely lost my hair?
We watched The Oscars and the poor child sat patiently asking, ‘Is this Oscar?’ for every human being she set her eyes on.
She likes school and she hates school. When ever she whines to me that she does not like school, I insist that she has to go to school to learn things and she makes it in to another of her famous cyclic conversations. On a particular day she went on a walk with YaadaaYaadaa, picked a dandelion and made a wish, ‘I do not want to go to school. Ever, never, never, ever in my life again. I want to stay home all days. All 8 days of the week.’ See! Case in point for me.
We were going for R’s colleague’s son’s birthday party. YaadaaYaadaa asked her, if she knows the child from school/dance class/tamil class/swim class. The answer was, ‘YY aunty, you don’t come to my school. You are not my teacher. You don’t come to my tamil class or my swim class. But I know you right? That same way, I know this child.’ People, I have to say there are V.E.R.Y few occasions in which YY has been rendered speechless, any one who has know her will vouch for that. This was one such occasion.
Her favorite thing to do while riding in the car is to play games with me. So far name, place, animal thing; find the odd man out are super hits.
This 5 year old is forced to constantly catch up with her 6.5 year old sister. Sometimes I have to physically stop her from doing that.
The MPDs….how can I forget this? She has 3 different personalities. Bawawdi the cat – she licks you, holds your leg, meows and pretends she cannot talk English. Gaggiga the baby elephant – she hits you with her trunk and crawls on the floor. Diggie the dog – she barks and bites. Her big sister is her owner.
Finally a joke from Mieja, of course she got it from a book, but I was surprised she understood it.
WHAT IS A MUMMY’s FAVORITE MUSIC?
Wrap music.
Until later….
15 Mar 2011
I must confess, I am not a non-fiction person. The only non-fiction books I read are text books or books related to Early Childhood Education. Even these books, I survive because I do not have to read them from cover to cover. I flip through the book, pick topics that interest me and read snippets. Or I look for for something in particular, like a reference or the author opinion. To complete a book in this fashion means that I need to own the book and over a period of time, I would have read everything the book has to offer.
Of the books I read recently, India Calling is one of the few non-fiction books that has nothing to do with Early Childhood Education. The reason I liked this book is because, India is a land of contradictions and Anand Giridaradas not only put this in to words in an effective manner, but he also shows how two opposing ideas can co-exist.
Once I was coaching an American colleague on the appropriate style to greet people in India. She asked me if she can say something to effect of ‘you look like you are in great health’ or ‘your child is big for her age’, I don’t remember her exact words. I launched in to the phenomenon of evil eye and how a remark about size, especially a child’s can be considered as a mark of evil eye. The bewildered colleague, who obviously insinuated nothing evil, asked if the appropriate thing to say is something the opposite. So I had to tell her that such a remark will not be well received. The thoroughly confused colleague threw her arms up in the air because she was lost!
Look closely, there are numerous such contradictions. India is perhaps the only place where there are always generalizations and always exceptions to any generalization. Women are worshipped as goddess, but they are target of sexism. Women are repressed, but can be elected to the highest offices in the country. The society preaches commonality/blending in, but is constantly looking for a leader. India is a high context culture, big on social knowledge and non-verbal cues, but we have detailed manuscripts that details how every man/woman/king/commoner/first born child/last born child/daughter/wife/widow/mother must behave.
The Anand’s perspective as an outsider, on the surface level inconsistencies, how India is progressing and to what it is progressing towards is very intriguing. Sometimes it takes an outsider to see things more clearly. Good read. Thumbs up.
2 Mar 2011
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Edited to add:
The book is India Calling by Anand Giridharadas.
Congrats Reva on winning the quiz.
You can pick THE SEED or RADHA FINDS THE CIRCLE.
Please send me an email with your address.
I was surprised by the number of people guessing the right answer. Well done folks.
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As I was reading my older posts, yes I often do that to flatter myself, I almost gasped because I left the Sitcom Parenting survey hanging in midair. Sorry folks, way too many things going on.
Survey results are: 18 people answered the survey; 15 people voted for Claire Huxtable; 2 for Jill Taylor; 0 for Rosanne; 1 for Mrs.Beaver.
Now to the much neglected Guess The Book, book quiz.
- Guess the complete TITLE and AUTHOR of this book.
- Quiz closes Friday, March 4th. 4.00PM PST.
- Results will be announced Monday, March 7th, 4.00AM PST. Just in case I lapse in to short term amnesia, feel free to ping me.
- The prize is a book. I want to choose a book appropriate for you/your child. So will announce the title of the book after I announce the winner.
-Comment moderation is on.
Your picture clue is
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