I want to discuss a few popular streams of preschools in this post. Most of the information will apply to families living in the US. Which doesn’t mean that the others must not read this post. Even if you do not have school age children, please do read on, because I would love to hear your opinions on this subject. 🙂

Through out this post I will be using she/her, as required. It sounds too formal/politically correct to keep repeating he/she, his/her every time I make reference to a child. Just like the word man means both man and woman, my reference to she means both he and she. Yes, I am partial towards ‘she’ because I have two girls 🙂

It seems like only yesterday hubby an self were breaking our heads to pick a day care for toddler, already it is time to start thinking about preschools! After a few months of thinking, visting, revisiting ideas, it will be that time to start acting!

We are all parents, so we all know clearly well, what a preschool is. No definitions required. The general norm, irrespective of which part of the world you live in, is to send your child off to preschool when the child turns three. Most of the preschools in US, require that the children have completed two years, nine months and are potty trained before they take them in. Some of the smaller preschools might be a little lax on this rule, they might take the child in as early as two years and six months and are okay if the child wears training pants.

A child’s brain grows at a tremendous pace till the child reaches 6 years. When the child is approximately 5 years, her brain is supposed to be more or less the size of an adult brain. The idea of sending the child to preschools is to make use of these essential years. Attending preschool or getting the benefits of a preschool education at home gives the child a head start through out her life.

Every child is different. So the method the child must be taught must differ too. We have to have an understanding about the types of education and the temperament of the child, in order to pick the best preschool for the child.

Now, to the two main methods of education – which in simple terms can be called as the child-centered method and the teacher-centered method. For the most part the Montessori style is a child-centered approach, but since there is a lot of unique stuff to be said about this style of education, I am putting in to a separate category.

A child-centered method is one where the basic goal is the wholesome and autonomous development of the child. The individuality of a child is celebrated. There is no segregation in terms of subject, it is believed that all the subjects are inter related. This method is based on the assumption that every child is growth seeking and has the intrinsic motivation to learn, which is true. Only as we grow, we start piling up negativity, laziness and become bums. There is no preset curriculum for this method, there are rough guidelines, but what the child learns is totally up to the child and the teacher. All the activities are chosen by the child. The child gets to decide when, what, how she wants to learn and when she wants to play. Interaction, between the kids and kids adult interaction is highly encouraged, because this method believes that is how children learn. Most of the preschools in the US and around the world were based on this method until the Asian influence seeped in, me thinks :).

The only place where I have seen this type of education practiced in its true essence is the lab schools aka the childcare centers affiliated with an educational institution. Every educational institution, which has a child studies department, has its own child care facility. They organize the children according to their age groups. The children age group 3.5 years – 5 years have a preschool program. The environment is set up every day and the children can do anything they opt for, throughout the day. It might sound and seem like all play, but they do teach cool stuff. The couple of weeks I was there in my lab school, the kids were taught about photosynthesis, life cycles of a butterflies, silk worms, democracy and career options when they grow up.

But, couple of negatives about this style of education is that,

The kind of kids who will thrive well in this style: The beauty of this is, it will fit perfectly for kids from opposite ends of the spectrum. Kids who are social bees take naturally to this style. But it doesn’t mean that a very shy toddler will not do well. This might be a good chance to draw your toddler out. Kids are known to interact easily with other kids than with adults. Also if the child is from a family where the adults believe that children are supposed to run around and have fun, go for this. After preschool, make a slow transition to an academically oriented school.

A teacher-centered method is a style educating the child by teaching the child conformity. The children are motivated to learn through external means – test, assignment kind of stuff. This style is based on the theory that the environment shapes a person. The characteristics of this style of education is its emphasis on product over process, separate subjects, fixed curriculum for all the students and imporantc of an authority figure(namely the teacher). Interaction between the teacher and the children is encouraged, but there is a limit on the interaction between the kids. Every school in India is based on this style, so I don’t think we need any further explanations.

The kind of kids who will thrive well in this style: Kids who thrive on structure. The amount of openness in the activities that can be done over whelms kids many times. The kids might start one activity, suddenly jump to the next and will end up not learning anything properly. All kids are fickle, but there are varying levels in the fickleness. If you feel that the child needs some kind of conformity in order improve her concentration, jump right on to this style. If you are an Indian parent who is thinking about moving back to India and is looking for a temporary pre school please do the kid a big favor and enroll her for this style. Because in India, as far as I know, most of the schools are too academically oriented. Otherwise there might be a small possibility that the kid might have to repeat the kindergarten program once again in India. If at all that is the case, parents take a chill pill and let the kid do it. Don’t think of it as a year wasted, think of it as a life long investment. You can potentially crucify the child’s self esteem by letting her feel that she constantly needs to catch up in school.

Montessori style: Dr.Maria Montessori started this style of education in Italy at a time where education was only for the rich boys. Girls, poor children and children with metal and physical disability were considered ‘not fit’ to be educated. At a time like this Dr.Maria Montessori came out this unique way of education, the main goal was to give the poor kids a way to sustain their lives. Have you heard the adage, “Give a man a fish to eat, you fed him for a day, teach him to fish you feed him for his life”? Dr.Montessori essentially came with a method of teaching the kids to fend forthemselves for the rest of their lives.

So when you look at a Montessori program, you have to keep in mind the reason Dr.Montessori came up with this style of teaching. In a Montessori there is very little interaction – between the kids/between the kids and the teacher. The children are encouraged to work on their own, the teacher ‘guides’ them. First and foremost, the children are taught how to take care of themselves – basics like how to wear their shoes, how to dress them selves, how to clean their environment…kind of simple activities. Lots of stress is placed on nature, most of the materials used are natural. In the present days, the Montessori programs are highly watered down versions of the original method.

The kind of kids who will thrive well in this style: Kids who love independence, interacting with nature. If you have a special needs kid (like ADD), go for this method, because there is low teacher: student ratio in a Montessori (might vary from program to program, check with the provider about this information).

I know toddler will thrive well in an academically oriented program, but I just want her to get the benefits of a much more relaxed curriculum, after all this is the age to run around and have fun. So I am still dilly dallying. Hubby has his heart set on a full blown, completely academic program.

Will also do a post (sometime soon) about the choice of schools, when to apply, how to apply etc, but that will be more focused to the California bay area.

I had chicken pox when I was 11 years old. I remember my mother getting worried. On the other hand I was kicked that I got to stay at home for two weeks. I was missing the revision exam, how cool was that?! Chicken pox was associated with Mariyamman, so my mom tied a bunch of neem leaves outside the house, we turned away visitors, the house was cleaned twice every day, my clothes were washed separately, I got bland yucky tasteless food, my mother didn’t season any thing she cooked (even for others) for two weeks, I was given tender coconut water twice a day, no milk product of any kind for two weeks, plain boiled veggies like greens and squash, I was allowed to have a shower only after the blisters started to dry (imagine not having a shower for five days in the middle of april?!!), bath with sesame oil, neem paste and turmeric powder. My mom didn’t do her usual daily pooja because Mariyamman is already angry and she didn’t want to offend the goddess at home by praying to other Gods. And no medication of any kind, again Mariyamman gets offended.

A week back my 11 month old infant was diagnosed with chicken pox. If I could look at a mirror when the doctor said, “Sorry, it looks like chicken pox”, it would have had the exact same expression my mother had when I was down with chicken pox! Some things never change. Anyways the doctor said that good thing was chicken pox is much milder in babies and now she has life time immunity against chicken pox. Doctors directions were usual diet, apply calamine lotion if she gets itchy, give her Benadryl (antihistamine) if she is extremely itchy, Tylenol if her fever is troubling her, bathe her with baking soda, make sure that she stays quarantined till the contagious phase is over.

Though there was no treatment for the cause of chicken pox both in India and in USA, I couldn’t help noticing how different the approach was here when compared to the approach in our country. In India, chicken pox was considered as something connected to religion, in USA they treated it as a contagious virus.

I had to decide what I must do to take care of my little girl. So I tried to analyze the logic behind the practices in India. I am pretty religious, but I didn’t want to follow tradition blindly.
Neem leaf, turmeric – they are considered disinfectants, also soothes the itchy feeling.
Neem leaf tied outside the house – just to warn people to that some one at home has a contagious virus.
Washing clothes separately, not letting other people visit, frequently cleaning the house – to maintain hygiene
Tender coconut water – cooled the body
Low calorie tasteless food, no milk, boiled veggies – When you are sick you have low appetite. Also the body has to spend lots of heat digesting food high in fat. The cause of Chicken pox is considered to be the result of the body getting over heated. So why make the body work harder to digest high calorie food?
No shower – you don’t want to break the blisters. The blisters might get infected and are contagious if they are oozing.
No seasoning, no pooja at home – I have no clue why? May be make the food so bland that Mariyamman gets sick and tired of the bland food and leave. No pooja for the other Gods….well I frankly think that Mariyamman must share more.

So I followed the things that made sense to me and altered the things that I didn’t agree with. This is what I did:
• I applied Caladryl clear calamine lotion on her blisters. It did help with the itchiness.
• I was determined not to let her temperature raise more than 99. So I gave her Tylenol as per needed.
• I was able to get tender coconut in Chinese supermarkets. So I gave her about 4-6 oz of tender coconut water everyday.
• I made her sip water every chance I could get.
• I gave her a diluted version of her regular diet. Formula, rice and lentils, mashed vegetables and yogurt. I diluted the full fat yogurt and also the formula, so that she didn’t have difficulty digesting the food. At the same time I didn’t want her to end up too weak and tired after the illness had passed.
• I mixed one cup of baking soda to a bucket full of water and bathed her. This was when the blisters were fresh. Baking soda alleviated the itchy feeling.
• Once the blisters started to dry, I applied coconut oil or sesame oil on her body, gently rubbed the oil off with a mixture of dry neem powder (available in Indian stores) + turmeric powder + powdered moong daal and washed it off with water.
(I grind some moong daal, sift it in a sieve and have the fine powder in a container. I mix it with turmeric powder and bathe my daughters. It is a pain to clean the tub, but I don’t care, what is the hurry to use soap?)
• I made sure I wasn’t carrying her when I was cooking.
• All of us at home washed our hands frequently.

My baby girl is doing so good so far. The doctor said that sometimes the old blisters dry out and she might break out with new ones a few days later. We have one more week to go, I am keeping my fingers crossed.

Ms.Mariyamman, I haven’t offended you right? If so take it out on me, not my baby girl. It already tore me to see her break out in 40-50 of red blisters within a matter of two hours. I certainly was no fun watch her curl up on my chest with a tired expression in her eyes.

PS: There are blisters even on the scalp. So do not comb the baby’s hair. May be gently detangle hair with fingers. We had recently shaved her head, so I didn’t have that to worry about.

Both my children suffer from loose stools every time they cut a tooth. They just have frequent BM, but are active in general.

If your baby is having loose stools, more frequent than normal, but is not in any major pain or discomfort there are a few traditional cures for the problem.

What to give

Tapioca Stew(Javvarisi kanji in Tamil)

Ajwain(Omam) tea

Roasted channa daal

What to avoid
Spinach or any iron rich food.
Excess of dairy