You mention one word to ‘The Very Particular Girl’ and she constructs such vivid mental images that if put in words would fill a book.

The mother says ‘ice cream’ and ‘The Very Particular Girl’ imagines one scoop chocolate ice cream with sprinkles and M&Ms with a cherry on top, in a kids sized waffle cone. This to be had in the Cold Stone Creamery close to her house, sitting at the square table against the wall with three chairs around the table. She visualizes that her mother would be sitting next to her with a white plastic spoon on her hand. She visualizes that she is allowing her mother to swipe her ice cream from time to time and swatting her hands away at other times. She visualizes her younger sister sitting across from her eating vanilla ice cream with sprinkles and M&Ms in a kid sized sugar cone. She had already visualized what clothes the trio would be wearing.

If the mother had said ‘ice cream’ during an outing in which the little sister had not accompanied them…. no problem, she automatically assumes that they would go home, pick up the little one, change clothes and then go to the ice cream shop.

See the way the four-year-old mind works? She constructs an image, actually a movie clip, by gathering snippets from her past experiences. If the reality changes, the movie projection in her mind does not change. Her four-year-old brain is not that agile cognitively, so she changes reality in order to achieve her mental representation.

Of course reality being pretty real, there usually is a mismatch in the end result and the mental projection. Thus resulting in hands-flailing-legs-kicking-rolling-on-the-floor-tantrums. At times the mother has been afraid of ‘The Very Particular Girl’. There is no telling what ‘The Very Particular Girl’ is thinking and after the hoops the mother had jumped to do something that she thought would make ‘The Very Particular Girl’ happy, she had to face-ear-splitting-brain-melting-tantrums. Most disheartening of all, ‘The Very Particular Girl’ would come back home and pronounce the verdict that would descend on the mother like thunder “You made me very unhappy amma.”

After going through painfully small improvisations, one at a time, finally the mother and the ‘The Very Particular Girl’ have settled in to a routine. For anything activity they do, no matter how small it is, they draw up ‘A Plan’. A plan is nothing but a set of expectations, both the mother’s and ‘The Very Particular Girl’s’. Then they analyze what they can do if something unexpected happens and the plan goes haywire. The mother tells/warns at least 1000 times that one can only plan and life can throw surprises. The ‘The Very Particular Girl’ nods her head understandingly. Thanks to the plan, if something upsets ‘The Very Particular Girl’, she says, “But amma, that is not my plan.” The concept of ‘A Plan’ helps put things in perspective not only for the ‘The Very Particular Girl’, but at times also for her mother, because when you are a mother, you tend to just do things. In your heart, you are doing whatever you are doing in the best interest of your family. At times like that the little voice, filled with reproach helps the mother find her balance.

THE END

CAST AND CREDITS(Like you guys didn’t know all along!)
‘The Very Particular Girl’ – Chula
Mother – Yours Truly

[tags]Toddler tantrum, preschooler tantrums, how a child thinks, why do children throw tantrums[/tags]

Technorati Tags: how a child thinks, preschooler tantrums, Toddler tantrum, why do children throw tantrums

Photo courtesy http://theabfc.wordpress.com/

Author/Illustrator: Kathryn Otoshi
Recommended Age group: 2 and up.

When I pick a book from the library, I pick up the book for its social/ethical values or for its pictures or for the educational values. Books like Flotsam inspires me to think out of the box. Books like The Relatives Came talks about the same issues we go through at home from time to time. In a nutshell, when I thumb through a book, I inadvertently shelve it in to a category in my mind. It forms the angle I adapt when I read the book at home with Chula and Mieja. Once in a while a book like One comes along and it just blows my mind.

Well, it talks about numbers and colors. So is it a toddler book to introduce colors and numbers? No. One is definitely more than that.

It has simple sentences and is easy to read. When they talk about the color red the author writes Red, making it easy for a preschooler to connect color to the name of the color in print. So is it an easy reader book? May be and some more.

When the author says, “Red got bigger and bigger and bigger”, she illustrates it with three red dots in increasing sizes. Is it a book that helps children comprehend comparison? This is got to be a early math skills book. Yes, definitely…..and much more.

It talks about feelings. So is it a book on values. Yes, that too.

One is the story of seven colors. Blue, Yellow, Purple, Orange, Red, Green and the number One. Blue is an average Joe. He has his days, taking pleasure in simple things, at timesfeeling insecure hoping that he could be like some one else. He is weird with in acceptable limits. Then comes Red. He senses Blue’s insecurity and teases him. No one stops Red. Blue feels blue. Red’s ego bloats. Now comes One as in number one. So far the colors are illustrated as a blob of watercolor. One is gray, he has sharp corners and angles and nothing like the other colors have every seen. One is unique not only in appearance but also in his nature. He stands up to Red and refuses to be bullied. He looks at other colors and says, “If someone is mean and picks on me, I for One stand up and Say No.” Other colors join One in his stand against Red, even the meek Blue. Now Red turns even redder from the embarrassment and rolls away. Blue and One call out to Red saying that Red can be a part of the group if he is ready to respect the rest of the group. “Red can be hot AND Blue can be cool” they say, because they want “Every body to count.” Red laughs and joins the fun.

The illustrations capture one’s eye. Simple enough to smack our head and think, “Dang, I could do it”.

I fell head over heels in love with this book. I bought two copies of this book and donated one to Chula and Mieja’s classroom. This book is so far the number One in my list of recommendations. I have even read it to couple of adults who visited us. I am just smitten with this book.

[tags]preschool books, books for preschoolers, books against bullying,E.B. White Read Aloud Award[/tags]

Technorati Tags: books against bullying, books for preschoolers, E.B. White Read Aloud Award, preschool books

…I would be Ron. Wanting to be something, but having no clue as to what the what is, waiting for something to happen instead of making it happen, dreaming of becoming famous without putting in the required hard work, always behind some one stronger, procrastinating under the pretext of waiting for inspiration, can catch a ball only by luck, buckling under pressure, rarely achieving and reliving the few rare achievements to eternity, putting action before thought.

If want to be like someone in Harry Potter, I would like to be Luna Lovegood. For her unfailing optimism, ability to find the truth no matter how jaded it is, telling the right thing to the right person at the right time (well…. except for the curmple-horned-snorkack bit), loving her dear ones, being totally secure about who she is.

Now, if you are going to think “What in the world is going on with her?”, I am just being my worst critic. Not feeling disillusioned or dispirited. Other than serious Harry Potter withdrawal symptoms, mental health well with in desired spectrum folks

If you feel up to it, indulge me folks.
Take it up as a tag.
Include the HP logo in your post.
Write about whom you currently identify with in Harry Potter.
Write about who you would like to be.

[tags]Harry Potter, Harry Potter characters[/tags]

Technorati Tags: Harry Potter, Harry Potter characters

Cross posted here.

For previous posts in the cooking with kids mini-series:

KOOTANCHORU
THE SCIENCE BEHIND COOKING

Here are some pointers on how to cook with kids.

• When you invite your children in to the kitchen your main motive is must be inclusion and having fun. Learning will automatically flow from the conducive environment you are creating. If you start with, “I am going to TEACH this child geometry through toast making”, you will end up frustrated. Not to mention burnt toast.

• Pick simple recipes. This way you don’t have to put off cooking with your child till the child is a certain age. Some simple suggestions are spreading butter/cream cheese on bread, tearing lettuce, scooping melon, shredding cheese. Remember the idea is having fun, not creating a culinary wonder.

• Break down complicated recipes in to simple steps and involve kids in things like washing and cutting the veggies. Especially the vegetables like cauliflower, mushroom, beans, cucumber etc are easy to cut. I save the sturdy take out knives for this purpose. Safe on little fingers, sharp enough to slice through the vegetables.

• Slowly build up from the basics. For example show them how to spread jelly/cream cheese on toast. Follow it up letting them do the spreading on their own. Then introduce a picture recipe like this. Later discuss the process with your kids.

• If there are siblings and you are working together on a recipe, assign each child a specific role like mixer, washer etc. Trust me, cuts down on lots of squabbles.

• What you make in the kitchen with the kids does not always have to be an edible recipe. You can try play dough recipes or bubble recipes.

• Encouraging children to invent their recipes can be a good thing. I allow a highly restricted version of this. For me the first priority is not to waste food. So I let them combine and test only a limited set of ingredients, which I know for sure will produce and edible concoction.

• Last but not the least, follow safety measures and hygiene.

Some cook books I enjoyed

If you are thinking of a gift to children in the 3-6 age group, these books are excellent.

• Pretend Soup And Other Real Recipes By Mollie Katzen and Ann Henderson
• Cool Kids Cook by Donna Hay

If you are fretting that your child does not eat vegetables, Jessica has some recipes to ‘sneak’ veggies in to your child’s diet.

• Deceptively Delicious By Jessica Seinfeld

If you are thirsting for more information on the science behind cooking, look no further.

• The Cooking Book By Laura Colker

[tags]preschool kids, cooking with kids, pointers on cooking with kids, how to cook with kids, resources for cooking with kids, child development, cook to learn, science behind cooking[/tags]

Technorati Tags: Child Development, cook to learn, cooking with kids, how to cook with kids, pointers on cooking with kids, preschool kids, resources for cooking with kids, science behind cooking

All the pictures from this post are from google images.

There I was sitting with my research for the sequel for KOOTANCHORU and realized that Dipali, Art, PG and Sue have already listed the major concepts in the comments section.

Dipali says,

“Great for mathematical concepts like weight, volume, division etc. Starting from purchasing of ingredients- costs of different things. Scientific concepts:The change that heat brings about to raw ingredients. How different ways of cooking can give a different end product with the same ingredient. Textures, odours, sizes, shapes- there’s a whole world of things to be learned and taught:)
Haven’t even scratched the surface yet!”

Artnavy takes it a step further and expands into the concept that food and culture go hand in hand. She says,

“u can teach about flavours- festivals- what the Gods like
temperature- ice- water – steam- pressure etc
weight colour texture shapes
vitmains- calories etc
of course satisfaction/ harmony./ organising skills/ leanring from mistakes and the whole team thingie are all a huge part of it”

PG’s point resonates with me when she says,

“In today’s times it is so important to realise the importance of healthy eating which is only possible through learning cooking. To learn about the basics of a balanced diet. And learning to develop taste for good food, I think, is very important for a healthy lifestyle too.”

Sue is looking in to the present as well as the past when she says,

“Great for teaching kids about household safety — how to handle fire, knives. Also great for hygiene. Also, the basic cleaning up most cooks do is great practice for when the kids have homes of their own.
They also learn how to store foodstuffs, grow herbs, mix and match tastes and smells. If you let them wash their own aprons and washcloths, the older ones learn basic hand laundering and stain removal skills. They may sound unimportant but they make such a big difference to one’s adult life!
Oh and if they cook in an assembly line — say for sandwiches or salads or whatever — it’s a good lesson in every role being an important one, no matter how small it seems.”

The learning that occurs in young children can be classified in to three main categories – social, physical and logico-mathematical. Cooking is a scientific process that effectively covers all the three categories.

For example take the process of making a basic scrambled egg recipe with your child. The steps would be as follows:

• Take x number of eggs.
• Break in to a bowl.
• Add a dash of salt and a dash of pepper. For the heck of it add a drop of food coloring. Even adults love green/orange eggs right?!
• Beat well with a fork.
• Heat a tava.
• Add oil.
• Add eggs.
• Cook and enjoy.

Every family has its own style. Some might add raw onions, fried onions, a bit of salsa, veggies, cheese..etc. Every family personalizes the basic recipe in to something that characterizes their style. Heck, some families eat eggs only on certain days based on religious restrictions. We are now talking about the social knowledge that is closely associated with food. We convey our macro culture as well as micro culture through food.

Physical knowledge is not just spatial awareness that can be learned through jumping and running. But it is the learning that comes with doing things physically. By touching, tasting, smelling. If the outcome is directly related to the action and can be varied by varying the initial action, the learning is rich. What better field to test and experiment that cooking? Very true in my kitchen. To hubby’s utter displeasure, I change my recipes every time. When I say rasam, he is not sure what he is getting till he tastes it. For more sad stories contact R@don’t_screw_up_my_fav_food_#$%&*!.com

Logico-mathematical refers to the math and science concepts that can be learned through cooking.

When you interpret a recipe for a child like this, imagine the symbolic association the child forms! She learns that picture=word=thought=print=language.

One learns to count, not just on paper, but in the real sense, “One means one of an object, two means two of the same object”

One learns to compare. Half cup is more than a quarter cup, but less than one cup. Plus they get a meaning full introduction in to part-whole relationship A.K.A fractions.

Through their senses they learn what it really means by solids and liquids.

Older kids learn to estimate. If I need one person needs two eggs, how many eggs do two people need? This forms basis for set theory, ratio, proportion, one-to-one-correspondence, multiplication and addition.

Cooking needs to flow in a certain order. So children learn about sequence and concept of time.

They observe transformation. When we warm butter it melts and later solidifies back to butter. When we heat butter, the fat separates and forms clarified butter. Now it will not revert back to butter. When we heat eggs, it curdles.

They learn how things work. Just look at the different kitchen tools in this picture. Isn’t it amazing that every utensil has a specific work. Now, we can’t flip an omelet using a soup ladle can’t we!

And you know what, this is just the tip of ice berg!

Next post: resources and practical how to’s.

On a totally unrelated note, how many of you think about Audrey Hepburn in Sabrina when you break eggs? “It’s all in the wrist”. Thousands of eggs in the past 15 years and I think about this every single time. See cooking brings back memories. May be trivial but will most certainly fill you with happiness

[tags]early child education. child development, kootanchoru, cooking for kids, cooking to learn, preschool curriculum, kids[/tags]

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Say….. if a certain person in the blog-o-sphere goes A.W.O.L, then decides to show her face back again, how does this certain person make a come back?

(a) Give an elaborate explanation starting with why she disappeared and what has happened in the past one year. This, of course, is based on the self-centered assumption that the universe revolves around her and people would want to know.

(b) Just start posting as if nothing happened. The presumption is that the blog world is like a pond and ripples come and go. That is the way of life.

(c) May be she must strictly adhere to reading blogs since there is no accountability. Make a slow entrance.

(d) Can she really do this? Once fall term starts, will she be able to parent/work/study and also have time to reflect on it? Oh forget it. Just live life. Why even bother recording it? Do not read any blogs. Ignorance is bliss.

How many of you people have heard this term before? It is very prevalent in kids growing up in rural Tamil Nadu. In an attempt to make their dramatic play realistic, kids bring in real ingredients and cook a meal. One child brings in rice, another brings in daal, another the veggies. They mix all this in a pot, add a little water and put it on top of a small fire made from wooden sticks(suLLi) and cook it. The resultant mixture is called kootanchoru. The name symbolizes the team work that went in to the dish. It can be roughly translated to ‘community lunch’ in English, but is one of those Tamil words, no matter how well one tries, cannot translate in to another language and capture the complete meaning of the word.

Having spent what can be called my childhood, in a concrete jungle, I never made kootanchoru. My first and only kootanchoru was when I was knocking at the door of adolescence. I was 13 and we had moved to what was then the suburbs of Chennai(Now this suburb is swallowed by the ever-expanding Chennai and is one of the prime centers of the city!) A good 18 years, later, I still vividly remember the details. A lazy Saturday afternoon, three teens, making a small fire under a mango tree in the backyard and cooking rice in a small ever silver utensil. At the end of the process, the utensil was so black from the soot and I still remember the said friend’s mother rolling her eyes. We found the smoky flavor of the rice unbearable and didn’t eat even a morsel of it, but I still remember the experience.

Some thing about the different textures, the independence, the creativity involved, problem solving, team effort and most importantly the stimulus to the sense of smell involved is unique to the process if cooking. Hmmm, sense of smell, tell me about it. The part of the brain that is responsible for sense of smell is also in charge of memory and feelings. That explains why I end up smelling tea/idlis steaming/yummy tomato chutney when I think of my grandma’s house!

Anyhooo, all this memories about kootanchoru came flooding back when I had to do a presentation on cooking experiences for children. The main difference being, the general norm in India was ‘LEARNING TO COOK’ and now experts in the field view it as ‘COOKING TO LEARN’.

Any one has ears for more details on how cooking can be a learning experience and what are the concepts that can be taught by cooking, give a holler. *Pointing fingers at people who think that this is a cheap ploy to get more comments*, ‘Yes, I am an extrinsically motivated person. Now stop that train of thought and hit the comment section.’

early child education, child development, kootanchoru, Cooking for kids, Cooking to learn, pre school curriculum, kids

Theorem I
The number of ‘NO’s a mother says to her child is directly proportional to (the personality of the child + life experiences of the mother).

Theorem II
In a particular house, the number of ‘NO’s a child hears is always a constant. This is irrespective of the birth order.

In order to spare the readers with the details, if I can describe myself in one word, while Chula was a wee little baby – HITLER.

But the second baby was such an eye opener. I learnt from my previous experience that there is absolutely no need to freak out. Mieja has lot more degree of freedom(from me) when compared to Chula. I really started thinking before I uttered the word ‘NO’. But when I said no it was a NO in 72 point, bold, underline, no matter the tears, tanrums, screaming. End of discussion. Case closed.

I learnt from experience that every single runny nose does not warrant a trip to the doctor. A trip to a restaurant can happen with out feeding the baby in the house/ packing food for the baby for hygiene purposes. If I don’t use Purell/anti bacterial wipes the world does not come to a grinding halt. The equation, ‘baby skipping afternoon nap one day = falling asleep in the evening = baby staying up well past midnight = baby with poor sleeping habits for the rest of her life’ exists only in the minds of a paranoid mother. Which lead me to write theorem I.

So you would assume that Mieja hears lesser number of ‘NO’s right? Wrong. There is this micro managing elder sister on her tail, observing her like a hawk.

NO baby, you can’t do that.
NO baby, you can’t touch that.
NO baby, it is not okay.
NO that is mine. Put that back.
NO baby that is not acceptable.
NO, come out of the room.
NO, NO, NO, NO……….

Which lead me to form theorem II

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Tharini started a tag on nicks. I took it up, but didn’t come up with anything ground breaking.

Of late, Chula has been using lots of nicks with us.

Her favorite is to call herself Cinderella, her sister Snow White and me witch. Thanks girl, I just feel so fulfilled.

She was gifted with a set of Strawberry Shortcake books for her first birthday. Over the two years, she has grown quite attached to the books and the characters in the book. She likes to think of herself as Strawberry Shortcake. So she has named the rest of us at home around the other characters. Her sister’s name is Apple Dumpling, I am Angel Cake, her father is Huckleberry Pie and my amma is Ginger Snap. In short we are Strawberry, Apple, Angel, Pie and Ginger.

Today morning she delivered the ‘cherry of all nicks’. She called her sister, ‘my dear baby compost’ and I am all like, ‘Huh? Did you just call your sister compost?’. Apparently I heard her right and she was even able to give the correct meaning for compost. Now, why on Earth?

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PART 2 OF 2.

Find part1 here.

But if I rationally analyze the habit, it is only 30 minutes a day and they are exposed to age appropriate contents. The way I see it, TV and the Internet have become necessary evils in the modern world. The children are definitely going to be exposed to these mediums. I could either keep the children shielded and in the process shock them or give them the impression that they have to do things behind my back. So we like it this way in our house.

Anyways, now my amma is here with us and she has introduced her flavor to YouTube contents. The children watch old tamil cinema songs. They seem to like the songs in which there are kids dancing/jumping or songs with animals.

But YouTube is scary. We screen the contents completely before we show it to Chula and Mieja. This lesson I learnt the very first day while I was searching for jungle book video. Just because the title says Jungle Book, don’t trust the contents to be clean and child appropriate. The first click I landed from the search happened to have the title or a song dubbed over the original songs, ‘Jungle Book, how a bear molests a boy’…something like that. The second one I landed on was ‘Jungle book meets the saw’ where the animals were subjected to lot of violence. Even I got a little scared.

Without further ado, top hits at home,

Varavu Ettana, Selavu Pathana – Bhama Vijayam

It is sooo funny to see the two year old Mieja singing, ‘Kanniyaraga vazhanum yendraal pillagal yedtharkaga? Kaadhal seitha pavathukkaga, vere yedhuthaga?’ (Q:If you wanted to live a no strings attached life style, why did you have children? A:That is the curse of love making.) It is still in the stage where the adults find it cute. The fact that she does not have a clue about what she is singing adds to the cute factor. The little devil is such a joker. She knows this will make us laugh, so she uses this when she wants a laugh from us. She does something totally naughty, I am steaming, getting ready to unload a lecture and she would hit me with this song. Manipulatress.

Kanna Varuvaan, Kathai Solluvaan

Oodi Oodi Uzhaikanum, Aagattumda Thambi Raaja – Nalla Neram

Do I need to spell out the attraction in this song? The elephants and of course MGR with his orange kurta and orange payjama

Chella Pillaigalam – Yenga Mama

Nila Kaikirathu, Acham Acham Yillai – Indira

Anjali, Anjali, Anjali – Anjali

Natha Vinothangal – Salangai Oli

Janani, Janani – Thai mookambikai

Kurai Ondrum Yillai

Bhaja Govindam

A sample of Chula singing tamil songs.
Agattumda Thambi Raaja

Kanna Varuvaan

Kurai

And this is Mieja singing…
Varau Kannan

Saa Sing Nila

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