14 Jul 2008
Theorem I
The number of ‘NO’s a mother says to her child is directly proportional to (the personality of the child + life experiences of the mother).
Theorem II
In a particular house, the number of ‘NO’s a child hears is always a constant. This is irrespective of the birth order.
In order to spare the readers with the details, if I can describe myself in one word, while Chula was a wee little baby – HITLER.
But the second baby was such an eye opener. I learnt from my previous experience that there is absolutely no need to freak out. Mieja has lot more degree of freedom(from me) when compared to Chula. I really started thinking before I uttered the word ‘NO’. But when I said no it was a NO in 72 point, bold, underline, no matter the tears, tanrums, screaming. End of discussion. Case closed.
I learnt from experience that every single runny nose does not warrant a trip to the doctor. A trip to a restaurant can happen with out feeding the baby in the house/ packing food for the baby for hygiene purposes. If I don’t use Purell/anti bacterial wipes the world does not come to a grinding halt. The equation, ‘baby skipping afternoon nap one day = falling asleep in the evening = baby staying up well past midnight = baby with poor sleeping habits for the rest of her life’ exists only in the minds of a paranoid mother. Which lead me to write theorem I.
So you would assume that Mieja hears lesser number of ‘NO’s right? Wrong. There is this micro managing elder sister on her tail, observing her like a hawk.
NO baby, you can’t do that.
NO baby, you can’t touch that.
NO baby, it is not okay.
NO that is mine. Put that back.
NO baby that is not acceptable.
NO, come out of the room.
NO, NO, NO, NO……….
Which lead me to form theorem II 🙂
11 Responses for "The Number Of ‘NO’s A Child Hears…"
I guess I say quiet a bit of NO’s to Naren in a day….in some ways it is very frustrating to me, but then for the sake of his safety I have to, na?
Shobana, even for a minute, don’t feel guilty about saying no. Saying no is essential to a good prarent. Thats how kids learn their limits. With every child birth, the mother’s attitude changes a little bit. One might get more intense or relaxed. Sometimes, with the second child, certain things may not seem that crucial and you let go. Thats what I meant. Sometime children tune out, so parents need to learn the art of saying no in a manner that children hear and accept it.
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Truly awesome theorems, utbt!
So true, too:)
Thank you Dipali.
lol!!! 😀 such insightful theorems… i totally hear ya!
Sigh. my mom keeps telling me I am partial to the Bean – but the truth is, I’m just more relaxed the second time around…. I like your theorems.
LOVE your theorems! And I can attest to EVERY word you have written regarding how moms grow up between child number one and child number two. We witness the same scene – overprotective sister behind the baby saying al those NOs 😛 We even get reprimanded sometimes for not closing the gate on the stairs properly 😛
so..so true! I have to agree here. I think smiley hears more no’s than cheeky ever heard!! *sigh*.
MM, Cee Kay, hiya ladies.
Sole, she will grow up and start saying, ‘You can’t say that, you are not my mommy.’ So situation sometimes self corrects 🙂
True theorems!!
Here we have to prevent Div from being Dhruv’s third parent. Talk about micromanaging and hypervigilance…now we’ve rebuked her so many times not to ‘parent’ him, that even Dhruv turns around and tells her, “You’re not my mother”. LOL!!!
UTBT SAYS: Starry it only seems to have gotten worse. The second one is already a drama queen with infinitesimal stubbornness. She is in the middle of some major show down for some minor thing as putting her sandals inside the shoe closet and I am saying, “You can put your shoes away and be done with it right now or throw them around the house, loose it and cry for it tomorrow morning when you really need it.” Just when the she is convinced and shows signs of putting her shoes away, the older one walks in with hands on hips, “Yes. Tomorrow morning you will keep searching for your shoes. You will not find it. We will not wait for you. We don’t have time for that. We will leave you and go.” All damages done, I have to start from scratch, thanks. Now I have two children to address.
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